Decisiveness, Communication & Phenomenal Sex.
This from-the-hip post – as they all are – was written quickly and without any semblance of editing.
If you’ve followed me for some time, you’ll remember a post in my old blog titled That New Client Energy and Why I Love It. In it, I talked about why I love being someone’s first companion. I described the profound eroticism inherent to knowing that someone has identified the missing elements in their life, weighed different solutions, conducted research, and decided to hire a professional practitioner of intimacy as a way to safely fulfill their core needs.
I talked about the simultaneously powerful and vulnerable energy of it all and the power of the trust extended to me by a man who has decided to step outside of his marriage for the very first time. I vividly described the ways in which it all arouses me.
And then when I sat down to recreate that post, something occurred to me: The newbie clients I’ve seen (and there are many) who serve as inspiration for the above have something in common with my favorite seasoned gents. All of these men are decisive.
So what does it mean to be decisive when seeing companions, and why do I find those who are to be so sexy?
In my experience, decisiveness and communication are inextricably connected. My favorite men, regardless of tenure within the demimonde, are those who live by a code, communicate their desires, and openly talk about their companionship raison d’être. This is not to say that they never feel any guilt or that they never question their decisions. But ultimately, they know that what they are doing is for the greater good. By being able to recapture parts of themselves long lost without fear of emotional messiness, they are able to be the most present and stalwart versions of themselves at home.
They know why they’re with me and they lean into our experiences. They allow themselves to feel joy as they embrace all we do and the revelations that spring forth. They follow through on their decision to seek wholeness and pleasure with great conviction, and frankly, that comes through in how they fuck. The emotion – even if punctuated by vague internal existential crises – combines with the physical pleasures and camaraderie to create something beautiful.